I Need Approval

     The more that we talked, the more it seemed like a real relationship.  Seemed is the appropriate word.  SHE was, after all, still married.  That is definitely a fact that, to this point, has made things much more difficult than necessary.  I was in no way perfect; however, if you do me right then you have got a friend for life and I will return the generosity.  Then, on top of that, SHE seemed to have a yearning fot outside attention.  Maybe it was due to a lack of self-confidence or maybe it was due to being picked on or teased or whatever.  Something from HER past was definitely lacking.  I began to notice that SHE craved attention.  Which, in itself, isn't really bad.  It all depends on who you need all the attention from that makes the difference.

     I remember when you made plans with someone and you headed out to meet them based on what you guys discused and agreed upon.  If the person or people that you were going to meet were running late or something came up then you would find out after you arrived and were waiting.  I also remember when gas stayed around 90 cents to $1 a gallonbut that's a different story.  In this day and age of the internet, cellular phones, twitter, instagram, and texting, everything and everyone is at your fingertips.  None of these things are bad in any way but people can choose to use them in a mannerthat is detrimental topositive things and the relationships going on in their lives.  So SHE loves attention.  Thathas been an ongoing observation.  It could be harmless or it could show a gravitation towards a negative element.  I will watch and see.  SHE would always post provocative pictures and such and wait for comments or 'likes' from guys.  Naturally that was a little offsetting to me so naturally it caused a few arguments between us to say the least.  I mean it's not like I didn't tell and show HER that SHE was pretty and desirable.  I basically found it in bad taste.  I just couldn't relate because I didn't need that from strangers.  Of coursr hearing from that special someone is a good thing.  I'm attractive and I grew up knowing it but I guess everyone is different; I guess?????  Nevertheless, we continued to talk.  I wish SHE had more respect for HERSELF and the possibility of something between us.  Since the 'incident' that included dumb ass, a gun, the cops, jail time, lawyers, and blood, and no I'm not making this up, SHE still hadn't dropped the bum.  Very disturbing!  Whenever I would bring up him habitually cheating on HER, SHE would say something like is that all like it was insignificant.  DENIAL DENIAL DENIAL.  He would have to do something more drastic to slap HER in the face; I guess.  SHE is just prolonging  the inevitable.  I was coming from a place of true friendship and I also liked HER more than that but we had just started exploring the possibilities...